Ever have a "Don't Mention the Dolls" moment?

[Stella Maris]

;);)What I mean is, did you ever, in conversation with a "non-dollie" person have a moment where you had to mentally clap your hand over your mouth to prevent yourself from blurting out something doll related and completely inappropriate which might cause people to make that little finger to head circle motion when your back is turned?

Mine was this. was doing re-shoots with an actress I hadn't seen since she'd had her baby last year. I said, "What did you name him?" and she said "Ignatiuis" and instead of saying "Oh! I got a doll this year that I named Ignatia!" (inappropriate, clearly) I said "Oh! That's a wonderful name!" but I'll tell you, it was close!

How about you?

[lin]

It's difficult for me to remember that most people never think about dolls, ever, especially since I think about them all the time. When I have a new doll or get excited about some new doll I've seen, it's really hard not to bubble over and start blabbing about it when I'm with my best friend and sometimes I'm not able to hold it in. He is just not a doll person and will listen patiently for about a minute, then will put his hand up in a "stop" position and get that hunted look in his eyes. It's the same with my sister. She actually is a doll person, she just doesn't care for ABJ dolls or understand why I'm so wild about them. I hate being a bore so sometimes I have to bite my tongue to keep from talking about them.

[Brightfires]

That would be me most of the time when I'm not with either known doll-people or the game crew... I had my first dolls for almost a year before I even got around to mentioning them to my family. As I said in a conversation over on RPGNet recently, I don't care particularly what other people do in their spare time, and I tend to assume that they don't care what I do either... So I don't spend a lot of time talking about any of my hobbies.

[Celebare]

I only talk about dolls when I'm around doll people ^^; I'm very self-conscious about the hobby, too, and... it's such a small group of people, it's really not something the world at large can relate to. Even when I'm carrying them around for some reason, I only go into as much detail as the person wants/asks for, and try and stick with the simplest answer.

So my mind is always automatically in 'don't mention the dolls' mode.

[Stella Maris]

Yeah I definitely do not talk about dolls with non-doll folk unless they see a picture or something. I even have trouble describing what the heck the hobby is. "Dolls" doesn't seem to do it justice and I think people tend to judge you.

[Taco]

I tend to be quiet around people I don't know well anyway, so the dolls aren't one of the first things I'd bring up. I talk about them plenty with other doll people, and I'll share some things with my relatives that know about them (especially my mom who thinks they're neat), but overall 90% of my doll conversations take place with other doll people.

[crazybatt]

I very rarely talk about my dolls to non-doll people. Some of the girls from work know about them, simply because they've seen me surfing some of the sites, but I don't go out of my way to bring them up in conversations. The few non-doll people I discuss them with (casually), I don't get into detail. It inevitably circles around to 'how much they cost', and I don't care to get into a discussion about why I spend so much money on 'dolls'. :B

Also, when the time comes (as it always does) at a doll meet where someone wants information, I step back and just let someone else take care of that. I guess I'm just not really into explaining crap to people. I get all embarrassed, and then I get mad that I'm embarrassed. It's like, sometimes, they're my dirty little secrets.. XD

[slrphebos]

When I was trying to pick up a boy I met a couple months ago, my mom warned me not to mention the dolls at all. While I rolled my eyes I sorta understood. I mean who wants to find out the girl you might date has a very large and expensive doll sitting at home and she plays with it? So yeah I kept my mouth shut, not that it matters cause I haven't talked to that guy in awhile.

[Rorek]

Most of my friends know of my dolls, or even have some of their own. So I don't have the issue often. The only time I'm really reluctant to talk about the dolls, or bring them up is in the company of my inlaws. Though I'm also someone who usually has a doll with them, even if tucked into my purse. My Ichigo goes just about everywhere with me, inside my Hello Kitty bag. :doh

[Stella Maris]

When I was trying to pick up a boy I met a couple months ago, my mom warned me not to mention the dolls at all. While I rolled my eyes I sorta understood. I mean who wants to find out the girl you might date has a very large and expensive doll sitting at home and she plays with it? So yeah I kept my mouth shut, not that it matters cause I haven't talked to that guy in awhile.
;)Your mom is probably right! I was lucky enough to find a husband who is a hobbyist so he "got" the dolls, and I had often had them at our work so he knew my dark secret:shifty That said it's probably better not to mention before someone gets to know you. :|

[sgtgeorgecarter]

Wow I guess I'm the only one who blithely mentions dolls no matter.

But then I tend to hang around geeks and hobbiests of all sorts so the dolls are probably less weird than the kung fu films or BPAL...

[Stella Maris]

Oh believe me, everyone I know is a weirdo, but I want to feel superior to them haha.

[Karhys]

I totally know what you mean - while I'm happy to talk about the dolls, and often go on about them non-stop, there are just some times when it's really inappropriate to blather something about them and sometimes you have to bite your tongue to stop yourself. Especially with casual acquaintances or when meeting new people for the first time or the like.

What's even worse is when other people say things about them at inappropriate times or in inappropriate ways. :|

Last year my dad got remarried, and some time before that, we went on a visit to meet the two girls who would be my new stepsisters. While we all live in very different locations and rarely see each other and so it doesn't really matter what they think of me, I did want to make a good impression because it's nice to get along with one's family, even if they are new family members. My dad's new wife had seen the website for my dolls and shown it to her daughters (as they apparently liked dolls) and they thought they were pretty and asked me to bring them along. So I took one of the boys with me on our trip.

As we arrived, my new stepsisters came out to meet us, and I got out of the car with my boy. The two of them came over to say hello and to comment on how pretty he was. At this time, without even having introduced us, my dad felt the need to tell them, "don't worry, he won't be interested in you, he's gay." :dead I'd barely even said hello to them and I wanted to crawl into the nearest hole. Thankfully, the moment passed and we all got on with things, but geez, dad. :damnit

The moral of the story is: if your parents don't understand the meaning of the concept 'inappropriate', don't tell them anything more than they need to know about your dolls, or they will blather it without provocation to anyone listening.

[Stella Maris]

Haha don't worry, if he hadn't done that he would have found another way to completely mortify you. That's a parents job!

[eptrauma]

I am lucky to have one good "doll friend" who's also my friend outside of the doll hobby too, so we love to chat it up. We have a third good mutual friend who hangs out with us together and is very tolerant most of the time. (he collects dunnies and kid robot stuff) Other than that, i only mention it if someone asks.

[eptrauma]

When I was trying to pick up a boy I met a couple months ago, my mom warned me not to mention the dolls at all. While I rolled my eyes I sorta understood. I mean who wants to find out the girl you might date has a very large and expensive doll sitting at home and she plays with it? So yeah I kept my mouth shut, not that it matters cause I haven't talked to that guy in awhile.

Oh i shouldn't post twice but i had to comment on this. While i wouldn't go on and on about my dolls and their imagined lives with a guy i recently met, i REFUSE to keep my hobby a dirty little secret on this front. If he asks me what i'm into, i'm honest. I say something along the lines of "fashion, sewing, comic books, video games, ferrets, and i collect and sew for dolls".

If a guy can't deal with that, he can't date me. I"m not asking him to interact with my toys and be into it at all, and i don't expect him to listen to me about it and i don't talk extensively about it. But if i'm honest about my hobbies and it's a turn off to him, well, i really have no buissness dating someone like that. I want a man that will accept me and love me for who i am, dorky hobbies included. And thus far, I've had no problems.

[Kim]

As we arrived, my new stepsisters came out to meet us, and I got out of the car with my boy. The two of them came over to say hello and to comment on how pretty he was. At this time, without even having introduced us, my dad felt the need to tell them, "don't worry, he won't be interested in you, he's gay." :dead I'd barely even said hello to them and I wanted to crawl into the nearest hole. Thankfully, the moment passed and we all got on with things, but geez, dad.

Haha, that sounds like something my family would say. My dolls are "Kim's creepy gay dolls" in conversation, though I have to say my one older sister thinks they're pretty even though she calls them that, and was amazed at how different they look in different things. And really, she has nothing to talk about since she collects baskets that can cost as much as a doll.

People who know me are used to the fact that I am a nerd and love weird things by now. The dolls are just one more part of that. And if any of that bothers them, then I probably don't want to be their friend anyway.

[slrphebos]

Oh i shouldn't post twice but i had to comment on this. While i wouldn't go on and on about my dolls and their imagined lives with a guy i recently met, i REFUSE to keep my hobby a dirty little secret on this front. If he asks me what i'm into, i'm honest. I say something along the lines of "fashion, sewing, comic books, video games, ferrets, and i collect and sew for dolls".

If a guy can't deal with that, he can't date me. I"m not asking him to interact with my toys and be into it at all, and i don't expect him to listen to me about it and i don't talk extensively about it. But if i'm honest about my hobbies and it's a turn off to him, well, i really have no buissness dating someone like that. I want a man that will accept me and love me for who i am, dorky hobbies included. And thus far, I've had no problems.

I agree with it. While I was trying to possibly get a date with this guy (again it didn't quite work out), he is into the Final Fantasy games and music. So it would never have been me dumping the anime, manga, video games, writing, and then dolls on him. He would have understood. But meh besides the point. All of my friends know I have Rhiannon and plan on getting a LOT more, but they accept my weirdness cause of the romance stuff I write :yey

[Stella Maris]

I totally agree, you should not ultimately be with a person who doesn't "tolerate" your art or your hobbies, but I do think that it's something that you shouldn't maybe lead with. Like I didn't know my husband liked to build Legos until I knew him for a while. And he didn't know I sleep with a stuffed Lamb either!
What I was originally trying to say in my first post was that I have "Dolly on the Brain" Syndrome, and sometimes when I am with non dolly people something will pop into my head in relation to a conversation in progress, that I know they wouldn't understand.
Like for instance I always think of a certain makeup I do as my "default" makeup on myself. Often in my job people will ask for advice about putting on their own makeup and what I think for the first question to ask is "How long does your default makeup take to do?" but what I actually ask (hopefully ) is "How long do you take regularly to do your makeup"

[rattimoth]

I do wedding and professional make ups for a hobby...and I was doing a whole lot of prom make ups a week ago, and actually called out.. "ok, who's next for their faceup"

Strange looks, I got them!

I have done the name thing, but not with dolls, an acquaintance of mine had a baby and named it the same as a pet lizard of mine, THAT was embarrassing, I didn't mention it at the time (managed to save myself) but she found out later that I had mentioned it to a mutual friend, more strange looks.

My husband is the worst at embarrassing my dolls, he ALWAYS points out that not only are they expensive (bollocks! not near as expensive as my motorcycle or doors memorabilia collections), but they are anatomically correct, and he takes great delight in pointing out that my Mecha Angel Corvi dresses to the right, then offering to show people.. I think my husband needs therapy (only slightly kidding there)

Seek peace

Carol

[Taco]

I do the default thing too. Sometimes I see various hair styles and think "what a nice wig." or "that would look great on one of my dolls." Thank god I've never actually said something like that outloud.

[Catrina]

Most people definitely don't "get" BJD's.. I have people come in my shop trying to foist bags of old Barbies on me. LOL. They can't look around and think, "Hmmm.. my stuff would not fit in here."

The worst was this lady who had a four foot tall grandmother doll in a chair, dressed in a 1940's costume with a big padded bra. The doll had a gaudy flouncy polka dot dress and a these giant red lips, like a clown. She paid $400 for it and actually wanted me to buy it from her, for the full amount. She'd tried to sell it at a doll show the previous week, and not a bite. I kept trying to be tactful, waving around and saying, "Hmm... that might not fit in with my motif here (I have a BJD-only shop)...."

She stared at me with this, "Come on, buy my fugly doll" look (LOL). So finally I said, "OK well, if I did buy it I'd have to completely strip it and probably re-wig it and turn it into a gypsy fortuneteller who'd sit by the front door and have free fortunes for everyone in a cup!"

That did it. She was mortified I'd touch Madame Fug at all.. because after all, it did look "just like her mother!!" She immediately began wrapping up her mother-doll, and took off.

Catrina

[crazybatt]

Most people definitely don't "get" BJD's.. I have people come in my shop trying to foist bags of old Barbies on me. LOL. They can't look around and think, "Hmmm.. my stuff would not fit in here."

The worst was this lady who had a four foot tall grandmother doll in a chair, dressed in a 1940's costume with a big padded bra. The doll had a gaudy flouncy polka dot dress and a these giant red lips, like a clown. She paid $400 for it and actually wanted me to buy it from her, for the full amount. She'd tried to sell it at a doll show the previous week, and not a bite. I kept trying to be tactful, waving around and saying, "Hmm... that might not fit in with my motif here (I have a BJD-only shop)...."

She stared at me with this, "Come on, buy my fugly doll" look (LOL). So finally I said, "OK well, if I did buy it I'd have to completely strip it and probably re-wig it and turn it into a gypsy fortuneteller who'd sit by the front door and have free fortunes for everyone in a cup!"

That did it. She was mortified I'd touch Madame Fug at all.. because after all, it did look "just like her mother!!" She immediately began wrapping up her mother-doll, and took off.

Catrina

I lol'd. At least you tried to be tactful.

[Stella Maris]

:lol Catrina that is hilarious!

Rattimoth, your story made me LOL as well! I catch myself almost saying "sit down already and let me touch up your faceup" so many times!

And about the lizard, you did name him/her first after all! I think your china should have got the looks for naming her kid after a lizard:D

[lyrajean]

Most people definitely don't "get" BJD's.. I have people come in my shop trying to foist bags of old Barbies on me. LOL. They can't look around and think, "Hmmm.. my stuff would not fit in here."

The worst was this lady who had a four foot tall grandmother doll in a chair, dressed in a 1940's costume with a big padded bra. The doll had a gaudy flouncy polka dot dress and a these giant red lips, like a clown. She paid $400 for it and actually wanted me to buy it from her, for the full amount. She'd tried to sell it at a doll show the previous week, and not a bite. I kept trying to be tactful, waving around and saying, "Hmm... that might not fit in with my motif here (I have a BJD-only shop)...."

She stared at me with this, "Come on, buy my fugly doll" look (LOL). So finally I said, "OK well, if I did buy it I'd have to completely strip it and probably re-wig it and turn it into a gypsy fortuneteller who'd sit by the front door and have free fortunes for everyone in a cup!"

That did it. She was mortified I'd touch Madame Fug at all.. because after all, it did look "just like her mother!!" She immediately began wrapping up her mother-doll, and took off.

Catrina

Happens all the time in the rest of the doll-collecting world. Especially the bags full of trashed barbies (not even very old) that the seller wants an arm and a leg for. Yes, its an antique whatever that usually sells for X dollars (name ridiculous price here), but yours is (broken, damaged, missing parts, ugly or whatever) and hate to break it to you but nobody's going to buy it off you for more than a song.:oops
:D

That's almost as good as the ladies with the doll shops who say 'you paid what for that and its not even old' or 'super dollfie, aren't they expensive?' about my BJD and they have a shop or booth full of $500+ antique or artist dolls.:doh

To each his own...

[lyrajean]

Since my last post in this thread was a little OT...

Sometimes I'll be shopping with my mom or a friend, and see something totally unrelated that is BJD sized, apporpriate whatever and make the carefully editted comment, 'I know someone who needs that!'

At which point the friend or my mom rolls their eyes and replies 'Someone? -Or a doll?'

It is at moments like these when you realize just how well your friends know you, and any inclination you had of pretending to be 'normal', isn't worth the time trying to put up that facade.:damnit

[Honooko]

I generally don't mention my dolls to people until they enter the house; I live with two other doll-people, and play with them openly. For Thanksgiving, we set them up with a table and everything.

But when out with one of my roommates, we often joke. Once one of them pointed at a teenage girl with a REALLY bad fake tan and said, "That right there is the worst resin match I have ever seen." And if one of us trips, we say we need restringing, we're too floppy! XD

[Aruri]

I as a rule really wouldn't care a bit about random people knowing about my love for these dolls but my sister (who is also into bjd) has a crazy rock hard obsession with being "normal" or "not a geek" and will be mad at me for days if something about them slips from my mouth in her(and someone else's) company

I've tried to reason with her about it but she won't budge.... so I don't think I have ever hat that happen for myself but it has happened several times when thinking about how she would respond at my saying something to someone....:oops

[blackwingsblackheart]

I only talk about my dolls to one non-doll-person friend. I tried introducing Kiyoshi to other friends when I first got him, but they either laughed or ignored him totally. So now, when any of them ask what I've been up to or what's new, I have almost nothing to say because I've been spending all my time looking for patterns/buying fabric/hanging out on doll forums/untangling Ki's wig/what-have-you. A couple of weeks ago, one of the "oh a doll isn't that silly" friends and I were talking about sewing, and I said I wanted to learn to make miniature quilts. Fortunately she didn't probe, or I would have had to come up with a good excuse quick to cover up that I wanted one for my Delf, and someday to make a double-wedding-ring as a (very) belated wedding present for a friend's dolls.

[Stella Maris]

OT but I was just thinking this morning about doll sized quilts! I was thinking how you could do goth styles for all the vampire elves with halloween fabric, pink things for Loli dolls and so on. If you get into it you should post it in the Crafty section!
On T, I was thinking the response I would get if I went into this very hip quilting shop in Soho and started telling them I wanted to make dollie quilts!

[sgtgeorgecarter]

Dude it's soho, they'd just quadruple the price and sell 'em as doggie quilts. ;)

[Stella Maris]

Ooof. I forgot about that.

[derilan85]

I was telling my co-worker if I should spend $1,100 for a doll, since my co-workers know I collect dolls. She thought it was a old porcelain doll and I told her no, but it was valuable. She thought I was crazy, until she told me she spent $2,700 for a fur coat that she has worn twice since she got it.....well she left me alone after that:blush

[Catdancer]

I don't have any friend to really talk about dolls, so I come to the forums and other than a few people, most don't know about these dolls..though my roommate is always asking me to send him pics of my dolls so he can show people at work.
But with other non-doll people..I don't say anything unless they bring it up. and if they do, I start rattling off various aspects of the hobby getting all excited talking about them, and then they start to glaze over..that's when I realize, they aren't doll people..

[Stella Maris]

Ha ha I know that glazed over look well! My DH gets it all the time.

[Loki's Mom]

I'm relatively self-conscious about the hobby so I generally don't talk about it with those who know nothing about it (which is most people I know). Many don't really understand doll collecting (I use that term loosely to describe the whole hobby although that's only a fraction of it) and will wonder why an adult is going on about dolls that are clearly for children. *eye roll*

I also don't want to get into the whole "you spent HOW much on a DOLL!?" scene. So, I zip my mouth and keep it that way until I've sussed out their feelings on hobbies.

LM

[denise]

Yes I have! It's difficult when you're around non-dollie friends and you're ready to spit out that doll-related phrase, you have to restrain yourself from saying something like that. ^^ I know the feeling. :doh

Stella_Maris, I have the "Dolly on the brain" Syndrome, too! :yey Yep, I always want to talk about dolls, well mostly to my parents, not with the people I interact with daily but that would be nice too, but they wouldn't understand a thing so I keep my mouth shut, to avoid weird looks, tee hee! I tend to babble a lot about a Blythe or a doll I've seen and how beautiful he/she is. My mum listens to me and kinda "gets" it but my dad, no he thinks I'm paranoid. =D

[sephyelysian]

Usually around our family; they're already really eye-rolly about the dolls but they realize it's a very 'us' thing to do. I don't push it though because I know if they found out how much we were spending on our dolls, they'd hit the roof and never let it go. It doesn't matter that we're adults and can spend our money as we see fit. Or that they spent 5000 on a giant television. It won't be counted as being important because their interests don't lie there.

[Amet]

I have moments where I kind of regret saying something about my collection, but I've kind of given up and come out of the doll closet at work. There's a coworker who keeps asking me what I'm doing for the weekend/what I'm getting for Christmas/what I do in my free time, and I finally just started saying hanging out with the crazy doll folk/a new doll/sew doll clothes. She doesn't get it, but we started talking about how much she spends each year to see the Red Sox play and well... it's hard to fault the price tag on one hobby when you're paying just as much for another. ;)

[Mich]

I'm a firm believer in people taking me for what and how I am.If they think I'm weird then all the better, because weird is a Hellava lot better than boring( I think)!:D
One of my Hubby's work colleagues asked what was it with those strange dolls,( after him showing them some pics) but they they know I do unusual things( like Cosplay), but I don't apologise for anything I do ...After all I figure that if anyone is talking about me( whether it is behind my back or not), then they're leaving some other poor bugger alone, and as I've said many times before, I'll only worry about what people think when they pay my mortgage.:p

[Snuffles]

Well, being a guy, it's a bit awkward for me to talk about the hobby to non-doll folks. Still, I've made leaps and bounds from when I first began, and now I even take my doll out in public relatively often.

My parents were, admittedly, a bit weirded out when I first told them, but after I explained it, they just think of my doll as a big, artistic action figure. :XD

Also, I have the best wife in the world, and she supports my doll hobby wonderfully. True, she doesn't want one of her own, but I'm working on that... :nod

[Luckyl]

This is great to hear so many other people's spouses support their doll obsession, er, hobby. Mine does, but occasionally has to get a "chucky" comment in for a laugh once and a while. My husband got some major brownie points in though when he rushed me to the post office the other night trying to pick up my newest acquisitions. We wound up going to the wrong branch and he had to go back the next day to pick up "Chucky and friend" for me, since I could'nt leave work.

I totally understand though that it is like having a secret life in some ways, because most people do not get it like you all have said, and most think it is rather strange for a grown-up to enjoy dolls.

I think it is a creative outlet for most of us. It is just an uncoventional way to do it.

[earthspirits]

Unless I am chatting with my very understanding and sweet hubby, or doll friends, I don't bring dolls into the conversation at all. And even some of the doll friends (the ones who aren't into BJD's that is) show little to no interest when the talk turns to resin. :oops

[Stella Maris]

I totally understand though that it is like having a secret life in some ways, because most people do not get it like you all have said, and most think it is rather strange for a grown-up to enjoy dolls.

I think it is a creative outlet for most of us. It is just an uncoventional way to do it.

A secret life, that is very provocative:nod

Chucky and friend:)

[Luckyl]

A secret life, that is very provocative

Chucky and friend
Yes, Chucky and friend forevah!:D;)

I also think the secret life part of the doll hobby is provocative myself!
It is socially not acceptable, but we have our secret societies where we
can share our doll mixed with other private fantasies and not be judged as a psych case for it...:clap

[Resin Angels]

I'm very lucky that my best friend is also a doll nut like myself so we talk about dolls all the time, plus regular life stuff too. When I'm with my non-doll friends I don't mention my dolls at all, it's like I'm in the closet about my dolls, lol.

[AnnaMayBelle]

Well, my life, hobbies, and work revolve around anime and Japanese culture so the people I hang around with are used to weirder things popping out of my mouth than just doll stuff. ^^

[Laylian]

I haven't really had any, but this thread brought to mind one that my boyfriend did XD

He had just come to his first doll meet with me, sitting through all four and a half hours without a single complaint, when his friend called. He must have asked where we were, because my boyfriend said, "We're out in Mesa. Just heading back in from one of Sarah's-" A quick pause and he managed to tack on a strained, "meets" to the end of the sentence. He hung up a few minutes later and commented to me that he wasn't quite ready to tell his friend that he'd just spent five hours playing with dolls, haha XD

[AnnaMayBelle]

Aww, your poor boyfriend... Kinda reminds me of a friend of mine who drove me to AFO.

We didn't know any other local friends who'd be there, and he couldn't find anything he wanted to go to, so he came with me to the end of the BJD molding panel, then sat with me through Faceups For Beginners and took photos of the dolls and panel for me while I was painting... Then I drug the poor guy to the Dollfie Luncheon with me. At this point, he had taken a sinus medication and was yawning constantly, while sitting against the wall observing 15-20 girls geek out over dolls. I know the med just made him drowsy, but he looked so bored, every 10min or so, I was looking at him and mouthing "I'm sorry~! ;_;"

He was surprisingly patient considering I wound up dragging him to every doll-related event of the day til after a late lunch. ^^ ...of course then when we got back, he sat through me yammering on about doll stuff to my mom for a bit.

[Marilyn]

I think everyone who knows me well knows about my dolls, and if they don't approve they're gracious enough to keep it to themselves. I tend not to bring them up with acquaintances because the dreaded "how much was it?" always follows. However, I've had my mother "out" me on several occasions. :damnit FWIW, she'll occasionally remind me that I should be saving for a house, but she does love my dolls.

On the other hand, the only family member that doesn't know my dolls exist is my mother-in-law. If she had so much as an inkling as to what they cost I think she'd have a heart attack that we've ('cause hubby helps to finance it of course :kisses ) spent so much. I would NEVER hear the end of it. :wahwah Part of the problem is that a) she neither has nor grasps the collector mentality, and b) she's my MOTHER-IN-LAW. 'Nuff said.

[eristell_neko]

Most... Actualy all (lol) of my friends are geeks of some sort. Whether it's anime, or comics, or somethingof the sort, so they understand my doll hobby. I'm lucky enough to have several friends that collect dolls too. Also, I work at Toys R Us. I've brought all three of my dolls to work with me at one point or another. I also collect pokemon and other dolls, and play video games. I see nothing wrong with letting my coworkers know about my dolls. Some of my coworkers (primarily girls) like them too.
My parents.. Well, they understand the collector bit. My dad readily says that he has no place to talk since he spends tons of money per week on gun collecting or military paraphenailia. He also has several very expensive/rare action figures. My mother is the main problem. She's always "You should be saving for college/car/whatever" and i"m like "I AM saving for college/car/whatever, so get off my back you monkey!" My mother doesn't have the collector mentality like my father and I do. She does have a few small collections (tiles, teacups, baskets) but nothing like my father and I. Dad collects guns, action figures, and books. I collect dolls, manga/anime, books, pokemon, angels and stuffed animals. So yeah. My mom does have a hobby though. We both sew. So sometimes I'll be sewing a dolly thing and she'll gain intrest, but not very much.

My main thing is when I'm out with my dolls, whether alone or with a friend, and someone random starts asking about them. I hate the 'how much do they cost' question, because people never get it. I mean, how is collecting dolls, which I get enjoyment out of, any worse than collecting brand name purses? Or spending buttloads of cash on tricking out my car? Or anything like that. >.<

[Marilyn]

I mean, how is collecting dolls, which I get enjoyment out of, any worse than collecting brand name purses? Or spending buttloads of cash on tricking out my car? Or anything like that. >.<

Amen! :nod I love that in certain circles the woman that spends $1K on a coach purse or Jimmy Choo shoes is seen as normal, but I'm immature or just plain stupid because I buy dolls. Lucky for me, I don't care what others think. I love my dolls :heart

[eristell_neko]

Amen! :nod I love that in certain circles the woman that spends $1K on a coach purse or Jimmy Choo shoes is seen as normal, but I'm immature or just plain stupid because I buy dolls. Lucky for me, I don't care what others think. I love my dolls :heart

And I good number of those bags or shoes are UGLY with a capital UG. Gah.. Funny that I, someone who wants to get into fashion design, would say that, yes? lol. But really. Come on peoples. Just because it's a doll doesn't mean that my hobby is any less fufilling than your hobby. And at least I actualy do stuff with my dolls. I know women who collect purses or shoes and will sometomes not even USE a purse or pair of shoes. It just sits in her closet collecting dust. >.< Gah...

[Meow]

most of my friends knows about dolls, so i can talk about this freely^^
but when i'm in office or with my relatives, i will just shut my mouth up
because i think it's very difficult for them to understand this^^"

[hyschara]

Oh I do. Especially when I see clothes xD
To some people I'd say "Omg. I want that on Honey/Jade/Elan/my boy/girl/etc"

But to some, I could only say "Omfg. That dress is sooo lovely! I waaaaant!!! ;-;"
Obviously they'll say "Ohh I think you should try it out" and I usually have to stop myself from saying "Oh, I meant for my doll..."

I rarely think of myself when I look at clothes and boots and anything else awesome looking/fashionable xD

[hyschara]

My main thing is when I'm out with my dolls, whether alone or with a friend, and someone random starts asking about them. I hate the 'how much do they cost' question, because people never get it.

Do you actually give them the price? xD
I usually just repeat "expensive" in a very apologetic omgsorrybutican'trlytellyouthepricebcosithinkyouwo ntunderstand manner. They'll usually start spouting out prices (to which I'll still repeat 'expensive') until they reach a level where they go "omg" and I just smile apologetically again (even if it's still a hundred or few below their actual prices xD)

[Missie L]

I ALWAYS want to talk dollie-talk, so I often find myself having to bite my tongue when talking to my grandparents or mother... My mother knows how much they cost, but my grandparents would FLIP if they knew how much money I have in dolls...

Sometimes I'll be sitting on the couch, and they will ask me something along the lines of, "So has anything interesting happened lately?". My first instinct is to say, "YEAH! I got a new doll, her name is (Insert name here), and she's a (Insert brand and sculpt here)!".

I've learned to say, "Nope, nothing's really going on...". When in reality I'm itching to go back home and play with my girls.

[Sola]

Honestly, for me, it rarely comes up, but when someone asks about my hobbies or what i make, i usually list off all the other things and tack on a weak "...And miniatures." at the end. People are always curious about the tiny books i bind, but i don't always want to tell them that i make them for 1:3rd dolls, even though seeing their eyes glaze over is kind of funny. At "doll clothing," they clock out completely. :sweat


End result is that i never, ever mention it, unless someone asks directly. I've been thinking of bringing Ink to the office to keep me company, but i don't know if i want to wear the crazy pants at work. heh!

[blinkeke]

yes! like everyday of my life....
there was one that was the worst though, it was right after getting into collecting and customizing dolls. It was the 4th of july and all of my family and boy friends family and my brother in laws were all coming over to celebrate and hangout.... and I had to tell my mom to not talk about the dolls as I new I would get made fun of... so it took a lot of those moments for me during the day to not say anything :[

[ToysRGood]

Happily, my friends already know I'm a nut, so the dolls are nothing spectacular. They've come to work with me (Esheki is rolling about on the table beside me in this meeting, actually!) But, when there are board members lurking about, the dolls hide among the other toy clutter in my office...

[Meldandy]

I made a mistake just after I got the first one. I was really excited about it and introduced the topic as "come look at my new kid" to my daughter's physical therapist. She misunderstood; she thought I was pregnant. Whoops. Not what I meant. After that, I have had a harder time even mentioning the hobby obliquely. Most folks have no frame of reference. My mom-in-law keeps equating bjd's with Marie Osmond's dolls. :barf Not the same thing at all, but I'm not dragging them out to show her until I have them beautifully dressed and painted.

[Juish]

I loved to show off my dz ray before I sold him. I'm used to criticizing or odd looks so I ignore it and receive the compliments when they come.

As for talking about them around non doll people? I try to ease them into the idea that I have a doll, but people I don't know very well, I prefer not to mention it or mention it with subtleties. I guess you just have to figure out who would accept the idea and who just shouldn't know.

[angeliclizard]

I try not to talk about dolls to much around my non doll friends since im afraid of bugging them, but i can't help showing them certain things when I find them. I also don't like to talk about them arond my family to much, they don't really understand the hobby, and thats before knowing how much they really cost.

[Moon Lightning]

To me I like my doll and will talk about her to people if they come up and ask about her. But There are times that bringing it up would be a bad thing. Like for example. My family has a issue with a 27year old college student buying and playing with dolls. They don't see it as a collectible and beautiful hobby. They see it as I am playing with "baby dolls" and need to grow up. So I tend not to talk about it to them. On that same coin my grandma's are glad that a girl in the family likes dolls. lol. My 15 year old sister never had and never was girly so they are glad. The'd be the only ones really.

But then my sister surprised us by saying she wouldn't mind having a tanned elf doll from Bobobie like my Valerie but darker. LOL So who knows.

[Bronwen]

I think it's kind of sad that people are judged for having dolls. It's such a silly thing to judge over... I'm a member of several different doll communities and have different types of dolls. My internal filter is virtually non-existent so I talk about my dolls without hesitation and have very rarely had a negative response. I love my dolls and they're an integral part of my life; my boyfriend is a toy maker currently specializing in dolls, so I guess I just expect people to get it or at least pretend to be interested... :) Or it could be that I just surround myself with artsy types and doll fans and crazy friends with weird hobbies rather than "default" world people...

[this-lonely-place]

The only time is around my coworkers and my Dad. They really don't understand my dolls. ^^

[kishuu]

My moment was with my best friend and a set of his other friends. My buddy isn't too thrilled with the idea that I want a doll.
The conversation was about hobbies and I kept it on the usual stuff. I like games, anime collection re-ment, blah blah. I pretty much didn't want to mention that I want to start collecting dolls. I wasn't sure yet how they would take it, I really wanted to wait. He blurted it out "What she failed to tell you is she likes to collect these scary lookin' dolls." He went into detail about how much they cost, what they look like, etc. Their faces changed from acceptance to utter disdain.

I know he doesn't approve of it but honestly... Anywho that was my moment. Not necessarily set up as the original poster outlined but still a experience where I wish it wasn't said. To this day they tease me about it. When my doll comes in he won't be taken around them.

[Amaira Rose]

What I mean is, did you ever, in conversation with a "non-dollie" person have a moment where you had to mentally clap your hand over your mouth to prevent yourself from blurting out something doll related and completely inappropriate which might cause people to make that little finger to head circle motion when your back is turned?

Er... yes, I'm so guilty. I've had many moments where a friend of mine and I go shopping. She picks out this super cute top and I almost blurt out, "Omg! One of my dolls wear something like that!" :tantrum

[presidentm]

Hmmm.. in my case, I kind of tend to not mention the dolls with anyone. I think people do not understand about the dolls (they are expansive and a littly silly for some people..) unless they love them like us. I do not care if they think I am weird but I do not want to hear anything bad about my children.

[Sebastian]

Not very often, fortunately, though I did have a moment in Japanese class where we were talking about stuff we love to do and it was with people I didn't know well. I was about to say "well last weekend I stayed home and sewed a brand new outfit for my doll", but realized in time that that was a big can of worms to get into with total strangers XD

[DaiLinn]

Heh, I learned pretty quickly to keep my mouth shut about the dolls... at least with my close friends (this kind of depresses me v_v;; I listen to them babble about stuff like RUMBLE FIGHTER which, no offense to those who like it, I really don't care for hahaha).

The second I say "doll" around a lot of them, they sigh and shake their head, or roll their eyes, and begin to get quite irritated when I mention it.

I guess it doesn't help that all of my friends are guys (why can't more guys be open-minded about dolls! I love the ones that are! haha)...


But this totally doesn't stop me from sometimes venturing to talk to random new people about them. Sometimes I 'test the waters' so to speak by casually mentioning a dolly photoshoot or something. Usually people aren't interested, but... haha worth a try!

[Kogepan]

Yes, I keep quiet about bjds unless asked, and sometimes I really have to bite my tongue to stop from saying something that would seem bizarre to a non-doll person. I think that's reasonable - I mean, I personally would be annoyed if somebody insisted on giving too much info about their obscure hobby ("I LOVE vintage soviet tractors! Have you met my dear tractor Polly Anna McGee? I named her after my favorite aunt..."), so I think it's better to not mention it unless it seems like something the other person would actually be interested in. I don't have a problem with seeming weird or odd, but I don't want to be a bother - I don't want to turn into that one uncle at the family reunion who NEEDS to show you all 7294349 billion pictures of his SUPER AWESOME vacation, y'know. I have an informal agreement with a friend of mine: I don't want to hear another word about a certain beloved actor of hers or I'll go insane, she feels the same about dolls. xD

[Chiffa]

I don't see why I can't mention my hobby. Of course I won't rant endlessly about my dolls to someone who isn't interested (also I won't rant about my dogs to non-doggie person; about my family life to someone, who believes in living alone; about my tech obsession with non tech people... the principle is the same), but if I have something to mention I'll do it... and if people are not ready to accept all my peculiarities, I won't accept theirs so they just stop talking... and seeing each other. I don't believe in acquittance who only want to talk on some limited topics.

[Bobster]

I love this thread. I as many of you will not talk about the “hobby” to a non “hobby” person. Just this past weekend, there was a sale as the Japanese school I go too. We broke class and went to the sale. I found 9 doll books in the sale with clothing patterns in the back half of them. These were the best thing in the world for me to find. I left the bag sealed and just commented about the dictionary and DVDs I had purchased. I would never breathe a word at work or in just about any other environment. I have been to a few meet ups and pre-con work days. Only there or in these types of web environments will I talk openly about the hobby and of course the local Volks store.

Bobby

[eggsoup]

I talk about my dolls at work a lot and show my co-workers pictures of them. I have even brought them into work on slow days. I try not to ramble about dolls but its really hard. I keep the doll talk filter on most of the time when Im out and about. :( My Husband is really understanding though! He has driven me to the post office a bunch of times :)

[carurah]

No, I don't talk much about the dolls ... only comment on my collection of toys without ever mentioning the value of them.
Anyway I'm not bothering much more about misinterpretation. I don't wanna be like everybody...and not need the approval of anyone. :shifty

But do not talk about it avoids annoying yap.

[klum*9]

Yep. Been there, too. I also have had times when I wanted to talk about my dolls but knew it wasn't going to be understood. That happens alot.

[aiowen_darray]

Sometimes I want to mention them, but I don't do to not knowing how certain people will react. If they happen to see something of mine that's doll related then they ask, then I'll talk a little bit about them.

[MissAsher]

i have dont mention the doll moment every day, since my BEST FRIEND is scared of them.... its hard, I tell you.

[ruinchan]

I had a difficult moment with my RL non-BJD related friends once. It was when I had my first doll. I shared the news with my best friend and she was so excited for me that she announced the news to other friends. She even showed a photo of me and my doll to them. I got a weird look and a snicker in return. But that was almost two years ago. Now they're more familiar with my hobby. I even share my doll photos with them on my Facebook. lol

[shelley]

The toughest time is when someone asks, "what were you doing today?", or, "how was your weekend?" Then I want to say, "It was wonderfull! I just got a new idea for my bjds' costumes!!", or, "I finally finished making this or that for my dolls, you should definitely see it!". But then I think... oh my, this person doesn't even KNOW I have those dolls... and then my answer goes: "nothin, it was just another day..."

[numage]

My mom always tell me to stop talking about dolls haha
and my friends are scared of dolls, so I tried not to talk about doll with them ^ ^

[StephG]

It's always an interesting moment, when I have to explain how I spend my time. If I'm with my hubby, he'll kind of look at me like, "oh no...please don't go into an explanation..." :D And it doesn't really matter what I choose to pick as my "activity" to explain, people still look at me like I'm some kind of exotic fruit they've never tried. Most of the things I'm interested in - dolls (shooting stories, making props, building sets), artwork (watercolor, pencil, pen and ink), crafts (mosaics, textile stuff)...seriously, it sometimes takes too long to explain, so I'll just say something innocuous, and then they look at me like I'm boring! If I said I was golfing or cooking or spending quality time with my cellphone (texting, twittering, talking) or Ipod (destroying my eardrums), they'd competely get it...but doing anything creative and people are often surprised and kind of taken aback. They're not quite sure what to say, because they're used to being entertained, and not having to do anything to entertain themselves! I know this is a jaded way to look at it, but that's merely my point of view this morning, after having this kind of conversation with a person at Starbucks, where there just wasn't much to say after a couple of sentences... At other times I've had very enthusiastic, curious responses. Still not a lot of sharing, unless the person is into something creative - but not a negative conversation. But very often people are bewildered by my chosen hobbies, and I often hear something like, "Wow, I wish I had a cool hobby..." How sad is that! How can people just do nothing? The only up side of that is that their houses are probably always clean and tidy, unlike mine. :blush

[shelley]

I have to agree with you, StephG :) but what is even sader is that many people see creating only as some sort of business, and become so surprised when I say I create just to amuse myself and someone dear to me. It seems to them like a waste of time... They are losing a lot in this way.

[Buff]

Not had one of those moments, exactly, but I have certainly had a 'don't mention that the dolls are anatomically correct' moment. hehehe There are plenty of things that some people just don't need to know.

[Maxwell]

I usually ask my friends not to mention my dolls when my bedroom door is open and my parents are home. :/ My parents aren't really the accepting type to my hobbies... so I'd rather not deal with them teasing me and/or screaming bloody murder at me if they found out their prices... = 3=

other than that, If a person (besides my parents) notices them fine by me :3

[IamGears&Lace]

Blab to me anytime! As long as I can blab to you!

[demented pea]

I only tell my arty friend and my other porcelain doll owning friend about my dolls if hey ask. I let them see them and handle them as I know they will be careful/
I am an artist by trade and enough people glaze over when you say that! I do a great deal of art with very involved techniques and it is hard to describe so when they say "oh do you paint" I say yes,'cos I do but thats not all.... I never tell anyone else about the resin crew, they are again difficult to describe and I NEVER discuss price.

[Ms Kittys Closet]

lol Rottimoth, that is hilarious about the faceups.
hmmm..nope everyone knows I'm a dollie addict...I like my zaniness. Of course I wouldn't just randomly talk about my doll in an inappropriate atmosphere. I totally have them on the brain a lot, but since I am just starting into this hobby I haven't run into many situations yet.
And thankfully my boyfriend does not mind my dollies, he in fact bought one of them for me on my birthday. And...he enjoys it when I run down the stairs from my studio/sewing room/attic with dolly in hand and say look what I just made for (enter name). His reply just yesterday..."those pants are cool, you should make a pair for me too". This was in response to my boys courdroy plaid pants...and yes my boyfriend was totally serious.

[Ruki]

I always have to bite my tongue around my family. I so want to share my happiness of having gotten new shoes, clothing, or some new sewing project I'm working on, but yea... I just never mention them.

[Humbug]

I generally don't tell people about my dolls, I don't mind telling them if they specifically ask what my hobbies are. But yea, casually dropping doll talk in the middle of a conversation is difficult for me. ^^"

[demented pea]

I have just this week done a clap hand to mouth comment! A friend came to visit me(I haz a broken leg!) and she was going out to dinner with her other half and was all gussied up! Looking great!

What did I say...."great face up it looks amazing"! I had been painting dollies all afternoon and had BJD head on....she is not one of my friends who is interested in dolls. Oh well.

[Muffinator3000]

I've been having that sort of thing in my ceramics class. I've been making doll furniture, and today I was making a miniature chair, and people kept asking me about it...Nobody asked what it was, but if they did, I would have just said, "I just like mini things." I so wouldn't want to talk to a stranger about that stuff. I'm already annoyed about how strangers react to my knitting, I'm not about to find out how they would react to dolls...

[Linda52]

Everyone at work knows I have dolls. There are four of us there who have BJDs. However, I know when not to mention incoming dolls around friends' husbands.

[Linda52]

Muffinator3000 - find a knitting group and take over several tables at a cafe or bookstore. No one outside the group will say a word, unless they admire your work. Safety in numbers... plus who wants to take on a whole group of knitters and crocheters?!

[Muffinator3000]

Thanks for the advice, Linda, but this really isn't a knit-friendly place. I have one friend who knits, but she only really makes amigurumi using acrylics...So it's hard to relate with her and talk knitting together. There's no shops except for Micheal's...And when I've gone out of town to knitting stores, I haven't really connected to anyone. I do love Ravelry, though. :)

[Tygati]

Everyone who knows me has just accepted that I will never be normal. My co-workers are very aware of my dolls, and I've brought them in on occasion. The last time was for an after-hours training, and Surprise wound up in strange places after getting kidnapped for a while. ^^;;

[Linda52]

You would be welcome here, Muffinator3000. We have tons of knitting groups that meet in the shops and the stores.

Tygati - when I collected fashion dolls and had an office job, I took the dolls into my office. You should have seen the guys checking them out.

[Rubyliday]

Absolutely! My boss doesn't understand. So I try so hard not to talk about BJDs

[Keilee]

I guess I'm lucky; I don't have a lot of friends, so the ones I do have already know me and accept me for me. They know I'm a little girl at heart and love teddy bears, anime, Lolita, Hello Kitty, playing on playgrounds, and other things that would probably be considered silly by most people's standards. My roommate is curious about dolls but says she has too many other expensive hobbies to get into it, lol (she collects model horses which I guess can be considered dorky too, so she understands). Even my family is accepting of stuff, especially my mom and sister.

[Cainesrose]

I have MANY hobbies, including Larping, gaming, comics, warhammer mini's, historical re-enactment, reading, and ball joint dolls. I talk about my hobbies when they come up in conversation, and I'm not worried about it. My hobbies make up my life and when they are relevant to what I am talking about with someone, I talk about it.

I even made a Ball Joint Doll Mannequin in Changeling: The Lost, for a Larp I was in. That costume was fun!

[LaLune]

i don't even have a doll yet and even my friends tell me to stop talking about them cause they're apparantly "creepy" and that makes me creepy too :whome

[obsessed_mimiko]

i have a coworker that i'm friends with (she's a non-doll person) & we usually eat our lunch together. when we don't have anything to talk about then i go into my bjd hobby. i always tell her what i'm buying for them & about taking their pixs. she's usually ok with it but one day when i was going to show her some of my new doll pixs she just outright said she didn't want to see them. she said she'll only view them if they were real people. makes me sad. now i avoid talking about my dollies to her. :tantrum

[V chan]

Most of my doll friends back home are crazy and we talk about our stories. But since I've moved I haven't found anyone here yet to talk about them with. My hubby doesn't really get the hobby, but he's supportive. He thing is guitars and he talks to me about it and I don't really get it either so we try. lol

[Hugobopp]

I am pretty good at censoring myself, which comes from growing up gay, but there have been times when I look around a room and think that nobody here would understand my interest in BJDs. This happens a lot to gay people, so it seems natural that I would have this interest.

[zimmaster]

I was buying tiny hair clips (the kind for little baby's) and the clerk looked at them and said "are these for a baby?" and I started saying "no these are for..." I blanked and then said "myself!" instead of for my doll. The lady looked at me strangely after that :S